It’s time for everyone’s favorite tournament: the NBA play-in. If I had to guess, I’d say more people look forward to the play-in every year than March Madness. It’s just that good. Like always, I am here to deliver scientifically-backed picks that are guaranteed to win because they are backed by science. Let’s see whose season will end tomorrow.
Miami -5 vs. Atlanta
- I am nothing if not consistent. I am many things, and one of those things is a Trae Young hater. In fact, it came out this afternoon that he’s pretty much on the trade block in the ATL. It seems that his teammates, coach, and now front office offically hate him now. I can’t really see him giving a fuck in this game, and that’s a bad recipe considering he’s going against the ultimate fuck-giver, Jimmy Butler. Miami always wins these dog fight games and I’m not gonna bet against them now. The only thing that makes me scared here is I’ve been on the wrong side of Atlanta every time I’ve included them in a bet. To spinzone that, it’s just as hard to be wrong about a team every time than right. Either way, you should know which side to be on after reading this.
Lakers -8 vs. Minnesota
- Oh yeah, you knew this was coming. There is no way I’m fading Lebron in a do-or-die situation. Minnesota also did a bang-up job at completely collapsing during game 82 this weekend. Rudy Gobert punched Kyle Anderson, Jaden mKDaniels broke his hand on a wall, and Anthony Edwards essentially told the Front Office, “Trade me.” It was announced today that Gobert has been suspended for this game, which might actually hurt the Laker’s chances. He really is just one of the shittiest players in the league. I really like Anthony Edwards and get so upset when I think about the Wolves trading the entire structure of their franchise for Adolf Gobert. If they somehow win this game and make the playoffs so we have to keep seeing him, it may be the worst thing to happen to mankind in human history.
Anthony Davis O25.5 Points
- Well, the only good thing about Rudy being suspended is that AD will be guarded by the Kitty KAT all night. If you’ve ever seen Kitty-Anthony Towns play defense then you know AD is in for a big night. I’m looking for him to continue the revenge tour he’s been on since March. If the Lakers actually want a shot at the title then he needs to permanently graduate from ADisappointment to ADominance. The more I think about this the more I get Lock of the Century vibes. Those don’t come around very often, only like once a century or so. Hammer Hammer HAMMER.
I’ll see you guys tomorrow for my Wednesday playoff picks, hopefully off of a 3-0 start. Ride with the Armchair.
The Armchair Experts 
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