I’m only a week fucking late to this one. Apologies to all 5 of my subscribers, but I have been traveling. I can’t travel and write blogs at the same time, it’s a severe disability that will probably prevent me from ever growing this website into anything worth a fuck. Well, none of that matters right now, because the Warriors have officially been ELIMINATED. GET FUCKED
Last Thursday was one of the happiest days of my entire life. The Warrior’s “dynasty” finally came to a pathetic, embarrassing end as the GOAT took a giant piss on all those frauds in San Francisco. It really was a sight to behold. After suffering through the bullshit of Kevin Durant joining a 73-9 team that robbed Lebron of multiple championships, I really needed this. My mental health was in complete disarray, and I was nearing rehab levels of pain and torture. The #CorgiCurse had my brain in a pretzel.
One of the worst things about the Warriors is the ridiculous luck they have, thanks to the Magic Horseshoe in Stephen Curry’s rectum. Every championship they have ever had has been because of sheer fucking LUCK. In 2015, Kelly Olynyk ripped out Kevin Love’s elbow, and then Kyrie’s knee exploded in overtime of game 1. I’m confident that Cleveland would have taken that series if even just one of them had played. Then, after Lebron pulled off the greatest comeback in NBA history, they called up KD in the parking lot after the L begging him to come save their sorry little franchise. It wouldn’t have even been possible to sign him if Curry was on a max deal like he should’ve been. Instead, his bum ankles early in his career forced him to a smaller contract that gave them enough cap room to make the move. Only Steph Curry could have weak ankles be the greatest thing to ever happen to his career.
Still, even with KD, they weren’t quite invincible. Houston had them on the ropes up 3-2 in 2018, before CP3 (who was dogging them) got hurt and missed game 7. Houston even had a chance in that game too, before they missed an NBA record 27 straight 3s (they were the best 3pt shooting team in the league). It’s shit like that: teams going inexplicably cold when they absolutely need it most, that I fucking hate about the Warriors. There was even a playoff run where they didn’t face the opposing team’s starting point guard one time. They probably wouldn’t have lost those series anyway, but they didn’t even have to break a sweat. There are countless other examples of that bullshit. The only time they actually got hoed was when they all fell apart in the 2019 Finals. Call me crazy but I don’t have a lot of sympathy for the team that ruined the NBA for 3 years.
Even with that Devil Corgi roaming Twitter, Lebron was able to put a stop to the madness. He has dominated Steph Curry in games without Kevin Durant. The Steph/Lebron debates have always been blasphemous. There is a Grand Canyon-sized gap between the two, and I don’t ever want to hear them compared again. Steph is a great player and has earned his place in NBA history. HOWEVER, he will never come CLOSE to Lebron, and if it weren’t for KD, wouldn’t have more than 2 rings, and Lebron would be chasing 6 or 7 right now.
Oh well, I will just have to celebrate this victory for now. Of course, it could all come crashing down at a very sad end if Denver ends this magical playoff run. I’d like to say I like the Laker’s chances, but I really don’t. I wasn’t a Jokic believer before but he’s making me eat crow right now. I give the purple and gold a puncher’s chance, but yee have little faith. AD is obviously gonna be the key in that one.
Rot in Piss Golden State. Never forget.
The Armchair Experts 
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