Now we have to talk about the defending Super Bowl champs. Oh wow, I wonder what we could be expecting from them this season… I don’t hate the Chiefs but if they keep up this reign of dominance, Nick Wright is going to turn me against them more every single day. I’m not sure if football is even fun for these guys anymore, or maybe it’s the most fun thing in the entire world. I can’t imagine what it must be like to have Patrick Mahomes as your quarterback. He’s the best player I’ve ever seen in my life. I watched a highlight today where he scrambled out of the pocket, spun a defender out of his shoes, then over-hand flicked the ball to the back of the endzone for a touchdown. It probably wasn’t even a top 10 play of his entire career. He can make every throw, always comes up in the clutch, and is a genuinely likeable guy. It makes me sick. The only thing keeping him down to Earth is his weird-ass Tik-Tok dancing little brother and annoying-as-fuck girlfriend. I’m still not convinced sending them out in public wasn’t a sneaky genius move by Patrick to increase his approval rating. It’s like finally having a girl think you’re cute because you’re standing next to the two ugliest guys in the bar. I can relate to that, I’ve got some ugly ass friends.
I don’t even have much to say about the Chiefs offense. They have Pat Mahomes and Travis Kelce- enough said. I thought things might change after they traded Tyreek Hill but NOPE. Pat Mahomes still went out there and put up over 400 fantasy points with a bunch of fucking scrubs. Only he can do shit like that with no problem. Anybody else loses Tyreek Hill and they’ll turn back into Kirk Cousins. I guess Skyy Moore could take a leap and maybe Isaiah Pacheco is actually solid but it will never really matter. As long as PM15 is running around making circus throws they’ll be okay.
Somehow the Chiefs have also managed to put together a solid defense. It’s anchored by one of the best interior lineman in the league, Chris Jones. I have absolutely no idea where this guy came from or when he became elite but I guess it happened sometime over the last few years. Karlaftis is another solid piece they added recently. There aren’t any other superstars on the roster but they don’t need any more. When you’ve got the reliable high-powered offense on the other side you can slack off a little bit on the defensive end.
What else am I supposed to say? They’re the defending champs, and likely deserve to be favored to win it all again. They didn’t lose any significant pieces and still employ the best QB in the league. If Nick Wright ever stops being a righteous asshole about these guys then I will go back to feeling no contempt for them whatsoever. They honestly did me a huge favor when they beat the Eagles down in the Super Bowl. I quite enjoyed the dirty bird fansbase crying their eyes out in person and social media. Please do that again Chiefs!
2023 Record: 14-3
1st Place in AFC West
The Armchair Experts 
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