I’ve suffered enough this weekend. OU Football loses in tragic fashion, pretty sure I lost all my Thursday picks, and I struck out at the bars again. The only way to redeem myself is an undefeated Sunday to pick up the pieces. We only can move forward, one step at a time.
Minnesota Vikings -1.5 @ Green Bay
- Kirk Cousins as a road favorite, what could go wrong? I’m no coward and I’m also a noted Kirko Chains supporter. Nobody look but the Vikings are starting to heat up a little bit. Jordan Love and the Packers suck and there’s no way I’m gonna be pissing down my leg coming into Lambeau today.
Cincinnati Bengals ML (+166) @ San Francisco
- This is my underdog ML bet of the day. Let me be clear: FUCK Brock Purdy. He’s finally started exposing himself (not in a perverted way) the last 2 weeks and I need that to continue today. Ever since the 49ers won their super bowl against Dallas in week 5 they’ve looked a little vulnerable. Sneaky story: they might not be that good playing from behind. If Joe Burrow can channel his innate elite ability to throw it up to Jamarr Chase we’ll be in good shape.
Seahawks -4.5 vs. Browns
- This line is a little high for Seattle but that’s kinda why I like it. Vegas must still have not heard back from Geno so that means we can still believe in him. The sky will fall out from PJ Walker in a big way soon so why not today? Even against Cleveland’s great Defense I think Seattle can put up points and I KNOW that the Browns can’t. Seattle, this is for you.
Indianapolis Colts +1.5 vs. Saints
- I’m not taking Derek Carr as a road favorite. I’m already biting that bullet with Kirk Cousins and there’s no way the Metallica lead singer is gonna make me do it twice. He’ll probably just throw the ball out of bounds all day then scream at his weapons for not catching it. I need a heavy dose of Jonathan Taylor today on the other side- don’t like Gardner Minshew throw this game away.
TJ Hockenson O55.5 Receiving Yards
- You could honestly substitute this bet with Jordan Addison as well. With JJ still out, I’m not afraid to take the overs on Viking’s pass catchers. They love to throw the ball, and if they get down early then they’re all likely a smash. I might be a little biased as a HockGOAT fantasy owner but he’s still a really good TE who gets consistent targets. Ride with me HockSquad.
Steelers ML (+116) vs. Jacksonville
- I’ve been absolute nails when it comes to picking Jags games this year. I fade them then ride them then fade them and ride them again. I’m just the Jags dirty little whore I guess. Vegas grabbed me by the face and screamed at me to take the -2.5 this morning. It’s just so obvious that I have to be on the other side. The Steelers suck and it makes no sense and by that logic I put my faith in Kenny Kitten Mittens. Probably gonna need 2+ scoop n scores from TJ Watt today.
I’m really putting my nuts on the line today. I think they’ve been a little too shriveled this past week with cowardly picks but never again. It’s come to my attention that I need to put a little hair on my chest with some grown man under dog selections. Beware Vegas, I ain’t comin no more. I’m here.
The Armchair Experts 
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