I am absolutely devasted to be writing this sad sad blog today. Yesterday I tortured myself for 2.5 hours as I watched the Warriors do the same bullshit they’ve been doing for years now. They beat the piss out of the Lakers in game 2 and the way it went down has me fearing for my life for the rest of the series. I’ll try to make this one quick, since it’s Cinco de Drinko and I need to ctrl + alt + delete some cervezas.
AD’s humiliation fetish started acting up again. He went from all-time great to all-time dud in just two days. His consistency in switching that up every other game is truly remarkable at this point. He literally cannot play well unless he has all of the mainstream media slandering his name for 24+ hours. There is no such thing as “back to back” in this man’s world. Well, fear not AD, you can get your juices off as I shred you to smithereens. What the FUCK is wrong with you? You need to take your uni-brow out of your fucking ass and play like a goddamn man from here on out. We can’t be doing this every other game bullshit against the Warriors. You know how much this means to Lebron, and I’ll be damned if you let us down like this. Be fucking for real. I better not see 11 and 10 on your statline ever again, or your ass is grass son.
A thing about me: I fucking hate the Warriors. They came right back and made every 3 known to man in this game. If they keep making 3s at this clip I don’t think the Lakers can keep up. Steph Curry hasn’t even cracked 30 yet this series and they’re still doing that. Of course, classic Steph getting carried by his teammates every fucking time. I never once doubted that the Horshoe stuffed in his butt, so I can’t say I’m shocked by this development. I thought seeing it coming would ease the pain, but boy was I wrong. Therapy isn’t something I normally condone, but it will definitely be considered a serious option going forward. Food has no taste, I can’t see colors anymore. Only a Lakers championship can bring me out of this darkness now. I CANNOT have another flameout in the playoffs. The Cowboys already hurt me enough for one calendar year.
Oh well, it’s time to go bury my sorrows in Dos Equis. I take back my therapy comment from before- Dos Equis is the only counselor I’ve ever needed, its never let me down. Viva Las Lakeshow.
The Armchair Experts 
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