Category: Uncategorized
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Washington Commanders Season Preview
“Left hand up Who Are We?? The COMMANDERS!” – Those are the lyrics to the coolest and best theme song the NFL has ever seen. I know their fanbase is proud to boast that anthem before and after every game. Let’s see if the Redskins Commanders will give their fans something to be proud of…
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San Francisco 49ers Season Preview
Let me just get ahead of this right now: the 49ers will bounce the Cowboys out of the playoffs yet again. I don’t know how, and I don’t know why, but these sadistic motherfuckers will find a way to ruin my life for the 3rd year in a row. No matter how good we are,…
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Seattle Seahawks Season Preview
I wrote the Seahawks not too long ago, but they ain’t write back. I guess that’s the Geno model that the Seahawks have officially adopted. They surprised a lot of people last season with their offensive prowess, can we expect them to keep it up? That’s what I’m hear to tell you, as long as…
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LA Rams Season Preview
I used to have a soft spot for the St. Louis Rams. Then they took a cool franchise and moved them out to dirty ass Los Angeles for a quick buck. Gross. The fans of St. Louis deserve so much better than that. I’ll never forget when the Rams made the super bowl in 2018…
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Arizona Cardinals Season Preview
I have officially moved on to the NFC West, and boy oh boy I’m not fucking looking forward to this. The NFC West is an absolute shithole in 2023, and there is no bigger pile of shit than the Arizona Cardinals. I’m a big Kyler Murray fan, and unfortunately the tides and narratives have turned…
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Minnesota Vikings Season Preview
SKOL, SKOL, SKOL. Who doesn’t love themselves some good ole Minnesota Vikings? This team never hurt anybody (except for you New Orleans). Kirk Cousins approval rating has absolutely skyrocketed the last few years due to him being a genuinely corny dad-like figure. He’s not the Russell Wilson “try to be Future” type corny though it…
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Detroit Lions Season Preview
Unfortunately for the state of Michigan, the Lions have been the bottom feeders of the NFL since pretty much forever. I cannot remember a single good season from them (except last year) in over 20 years of living. They’ve managed to throw away all-time great talents like Barry Sanders and Calvin Johnson with pretty much…
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Chicago Bears Season Preview
Chicago is the land of never-ending pain for football fans. If you even whisper the name Cody Parkey around there it triggers severe depression and anx mixed with a dab of hatred. The problem is Bears fans are now filled with hope because of their darling new 08 Justin Flelds. Could it finally be the…
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Green Bay Packers Season Preview
Break out the estrogen shots, it’s transitioning time for the Green Bay Packers. That sick fuck Aaron Rodgers has finally departed and the world is a better place for it. Unfortunately he’s still playing football but at least he’s away from the NFC and can’t hurt me anymore (unless it’s the super bowl). Now they’ll…
The Armchair Experts 