Tag: funny
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Green Bay Packers Season Preview
Break out the estrogen shots, it’s transitioning time for the Green Bay Packers. That sick fuck Aaron Rodgers has finally departed and the world is a better place for it. Unfortunately he’s still playing football but at least he’s away from the NFC and can’t hurt me anymore (unless it’s the super bowl). Now they’ll…
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Zion Williamson: Sex Addict?
Once upon a time the year was 2019. The NBA Draft was coming up, and it had 2 of the most anticipated prospects in recent memory: Zion Williamson and Ja Morant. These high-flying human highlight reels were about to set the league on fire, and everyone had nothing but praise for the young goats. Fast-forward…
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NBA Friday Picks Preview
Get ready boys, tomorrow is FINALLY FriYAY. Let me tell ya, it’s been a tough week. Being caught up in the American work machine has really got ya boy down. I’m hunched over, got carpel tunnel, and slowly losing my eyesight day by day. Nevertheless! I WILL deliver my perfect analysis on the current state…
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Dallas Cowboys Trade for Brandin Cooks!
Whoop whoop it looks like we have anudder trade down in D-town. The Cowboys have sent a 2023 5th and 2024 6th in exchange for WR Brandin Cooks. My reaction: Let’s go Brandon! I’m not going to be one of those losers that pretends they’ve watched any Texans games over the last few years, they’re…
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Chicago Bears FLEECE the Carolina Panthers
Big news taking over the NFL world today. The Chicago Bears did the unthinkable and actually traded away the #1 pick to the Carolina Panthers. Let’s break it down. D.J. Moore is an absolute fucking beast, excellent job by the front office. The trio of Moore, Claypool (fuck Claypool), and Mooney is pretty damn solid.…
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Stefon Diggs to the Cowboys?
After our brutal defeat at the hands of the 49ers this postseason, I took a few moments to pray, and reflect on my life as a Cowboys fan. Well, “ask and you shall receive,” said God- our prayers have been answered. The rumor mill is blowing at 100 mph right now and it’s showing no…
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The Four Horseman the Sixers Must Defeat
A couple of weeks ago I watched the Sixers pull their cocks out and piss all over the Memphis Grizzlies on national TV. That inspired me to write this incredibly well-thought-out blog that I then forgot to post. So, can the Sixers overcome their demons and finally make it to the Finals? Let’s find out.…
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Mavericks Blow a 27-Point Lead to Lakers
My genius is pretty much undeniable at this point. Right after the trade deadline I wrote about how back the Lakers were. I was ridiculued, called a clown and a fool for that take. Well, the losers and haters are sick and furious today. They were celebrating early in the second quarter when the Mavs…
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Russell Westbrook Signs with the Clippers
Hum Diddly Doo would ya look at that. Russell Westbrick is sitting his ass right back in LA after being bought out by the Jazz. Why would the Clippers do this you might ask? I have no fucking idea! I respect his heart, but Westbrook was single-handedly tanking the Laker’s season. It’s like he placed…
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Mac McLung Wins the Dunk Contest
The NBA Dunk Contest is something that has been in steady decline for several years now. I don’t think we’ve had a good one since the Aaron Gordon/Zach Lavine days when those boys Christened All-Star Weekend with cool-ass dunks. I remember being a little boy and watching Nate Robinson and Dwight Howard go at it…
The Armchair Experts 